glutton

I just finished watching V for Vendetta and I have to say, I greatly enjoyed it.

First of all, I have to say that I'm thoroughly impressed by natalie portman's ability to be not-natalie-portman, if you know what I mean. Also, she wasn't "garden state" and she wasn't "closer" or "where the heart is" or even "queen amidala." After a while even the most talented actress begins to seem like the same person over and over again, and I had never really thought of natalie portman as being exceptionally talented. Yet every time I see her I forget about who she was last. So. There you have it.

I'm very curious to read the V for Vendetta graphic novels as the author seems to have some important things to say about government and society. I know that when watching this movie, the most immediate thought will be of nazi germany, but I often thought of our dear friend mr. bush and his right wing american government. Fascists are, after all, little more than carried away right-wingers. Religious conviction seems to lubricate the transition.

I hung out last night with some gay christians at a coffee shop where christians were playing guitars and singing about God, and not badly, I should mention. I found the situation a little perplexing. I'm trying to figure out why any gay person would even want to hang out with christians. It almost seems like a "glutton for punishment" kind of setup. I mean, they'd always be trying to change you, save you, heal you. If they weren't up front about it, you'd know that they were thinking it.

But then I guess, it's the same as going to church when you're a heretic by definition. The only difference, I suppose, is that for the most part, I have yet to exit the closet. Why do I do it? Is it simply the desire to remain connected with friends? Am I a glutton for punishment?

I don't know. I bought chocolate ice cream AND chocolate chips. so I guess I'm a glutton for SOMETHING..... hehehehehe.... have a good night

conclusion and speculation

The good news is that I think I've come to a couple of conclusions.

A)The only version of christianity that I could possibly subscribe to is the universal reconciliation version. So I guess I'm still a heretic, but I'm on the team.

B)Prayer is something real and important because I FEEL it is, though I lack any logical explanation. This doesn't mean I automatically have faith for prayers to be answered..... I'm afraid I'm back at square one as far as that's concerned.

To be perfectly honest I haven't been giving a lot of thought this week to matters of the spiritual realm, or at least not to the degree that I can remember. My dad and I had an interesting talk about reincarnation when he came through... He brought it up in response to a comment I made about Puja's "old eyes" and we speculated on the matter for a while.

I've found that the general consensus with the people I mention it to is that they hope reincarnation doesn't exist. This brings me to wonder about the general mindset of humans on planet earth. It seems like people generally feel that this ride does not warrant a second run. Earth is no good. When people get off, the plan is to get as far away from it as possible.

I wonder.... if we don't take enough time to see the beauty in life. To walk like an african, as it were, strolling about as though we've got all week to get somewhere. There are fantastic things about the world, and even in the midst of terrible suffering, there are amazing examples of human courage and love and strength.

Maybe this is the only life we get.... what a pity to rush through it without appreciating what a miracle it is to be human beings standing on a giant sphere spinning through endless blackness.

I'm one to talk.... I spend ten hours a day on the brink of a boredom induced coma, and another 8 hours asleep. The rest of the time I'm running to get the dogs to the park, food made, and my addiction to electronic distractions satisfied... I'm in no hurry to do this again. Many days I just can't wait for it all to be over.

But I think that my attitude could stand some adjustment. I don't know. I'll think on it.